Lessons from The Power Apron
A few years back, I asked my family for an apron for Christmas. In my mind, it was something feminine and maybe a little frilly, vintage 1950s style. What I received was a black apron with white stripes, very much resembling a power suit. When I asked our daughter why she and dad had picked that apron, she replied, “This was the one that most reflected you.”
It was a great gift, and it’s been used many times over. It wasn’t what I envisioned, but it’s who I am. And therein lies the lessons I’ve learned from the power apron. Each time I don that apron, I’m reminded of who people perceive me to be, and I’m reminded that we all live in tension between who we are and traits we want to have.
Perception is a funny thing. Perception is based on behaviors and our interpretation of those behaviors. To complicate things, we interpret behaviors differently. When someone doesn’t smile as they greet us in the morning, we interpret they are likely angry or upset. The reality is they may not be natural smilers or they may be in the middle of a task. Perception can be deceptive. My daughter’s perception is I needed a power apron, when in fact, it was opposite of what I was thinking.
I own a power apron because my daughter said it suited me best. What does that tell you about her perception of me? My daughter perceives me as strong and decisive and business-focused. Yes, all of that is true. And, there’s more to me. There’s a side of me that is really drawn to behaviors that I don’t demonstrate nearly as easily, like being soft and frilly and serving my family delicious homemade cookies when they arrive home (note to my kids: this is an in-your-dreams-moment).
The balance between who we are and who we aspire to be can be difficult to manage at times, especially if we aren’t comfortable with who we are naturally. Age, and hopefully wisdom, plays into being okay with who we are naturally. I’m a power apron kind of person. That’s okay. My strengths are different than yours, and that’s where we bring value to our families and teams, in being different.
In addition, age, and hopefully wisdom, also gives us permission to defy perceptions and try new things to challenge our own perceptions and others’ perceptions of us. What are those things you’ve wanted to do, but thought, “I don’t have any natural strengths in that area? Why would I try that, people will think I’m out of my element”?
Somewhere between your natural strengths and the things you aspire to, lies your own balance and tension. For me the visual reminder is my apron. It blends the best of all of me. The side of me that’s decisive, strong and business-oriented, and the side of me that wants to serve and care and be domestic. What’s your visual representation of this tension?
This week, challenge yourself to clearly identify your strengths and who you are, who you are perceived to be because of your natural talents and gifts. Then think of something you’ve always wanted to try or do and take action. You’ll find joy in challenging people’s perceptions and may even land on a new hobby or job skill that brings balance to the whole of you.
Personally, I’m feeling the need to do some baking…
Keynote speaker, trainer, and consultant, Sarah Gibson, helps organizations leverage the power of communication, teamwork and diversity to improve engagement and transform teams. To buy her book or inquire about her speaking programs, please visit www.sarahjgibson.com.
