Success Looks Different for Everyone
I had a really amazing opportunity come up this week. This opportunity will look fantastic on my accomplishments and will widen the door to my national work platform. Now that sounds impressive, however, just because that’s what success looks like for me, doesn’t mean that if you don’t do national work you are unsuccessful. We have to remember everyone defines success differently – and that’s more than okay, it’s necessary!
What do I mean that success looks differently to everyone and that it’s necessary? It means, if you’ve accomplished your purpose and worked diligently at whatever you do, you are successful.
For some of you this means being a full-time mom or dad. For others of you, it means your family made it through the week, and you spent time teaching your children life skills, like being kind. For some of you, it means you made our streets safer or you provided healthcare in an emergency or you served a customer well.
Success has many faces. Too often, we let comparison get in the way of celebrating our own successes. We spend our days looking at others and thinking, “If I did that, I’d be successful,” or, “Wow, I should be doing more with my life. Look at so and so.” Comparison only takes us backwards though. It chokes us and keeps us from seeing the individual gifts we bring to the world around us.
How do we move past comparing ourselves to others? Here are some practical things you can do:
1) Make sure you know your values. When you measure yourself against what you value, you have a solid, non-moving goal. If my values include helping others, then I can evaluate if I did that today. Did I help someone today? Then it was a successful day. Our values provide an impartial measurement tool for us.
2) When you are tempted to compare your success to someone else’s, evaluate the cost of their success. We usually only look at the benefits of success in other people’s lives and neglect the costs. For example, others often focus on my travel experiences and say, “You get to travel to really great places.”
And, yes, I do. However, if you were to evaluate the costs of my travel, you would learn I often end up with a migraine by day four of my travel week from the pressure changes in the plane. That’s a cost. It impacts my first day home and leaves me ineffective for my family who has missed having me home. We don’t often advertise the costs associated with success, but I guarantee everyone has costs they pay for their particular success.
3) Remind yourself everyone has a purpose in life. Sometimes the purpose is glamorous, other times someone’s purpose may not be glamorous, but their purpose is essential. Think of the number of administrative assistants in the world who may not lead glamorous lives, but who make our worlds go around! Without them, we’d be nothing. We may not count that as success, but it’s more than success. It’s essential for others to accomplish their purposes.
Everyone has value. Everyone has purpose. Most often, it’s our perspective that’s off-base. This week as you are tempted to look at someone else’s success, keep these things in mind. Most importantly, evaluate your own success in light of your impact on those around you. After all, that’s what really matters.
Keynote speaker, trainer, and consultant, Sarah Gibson, helps organizations leverage the power of communication, teamwork and diversity to improve engagement and transform teams. To buy her book or inquire about her speaking programs, please visit www.sarahjgibson.com.
