“And Nothing Was Wrong.” But it Was. #MeToo
Quick disclaimer – this is not a political post or a stance for or against any political party. To clarify, we’re examining societal thought and change.
A Scary Time
This week President Trump talked about how this is a scary time for young men who could be falsely accused of sexual misconduct (NBC News article). I agree. Then, he went on to say when he was in college, he and his friends used to drink a lot of beer, “And nothing was wrong.” Here’s where I disagree. I don’t think it was okay for many men and women on the receiving end of inappropriate drunken behaviors. Therein lies one of the biggest misconceptions of #MeToo era – bad behavior used to be okay.
It Was Never Okay
However, it was never okay, but, in the past, we chalked it off as how it was. And, we accepted it as a social norm. Today a whole nation is standing up against what has always been bad behavior. Some men are being scrutinized deeply for their behaviors (currently Judge Kavanaugh). Their past behavior potentially impacts their position of power and influence within our country.
For those who are afraid of what might come to light, what can you do? Before you feel judged, please know every one of us reading this has done something stupid in our lifetimes. Something that would embarrass or shame us if it came to light. For some of you, this fear is greater than others because of the nature of what you did, even though at the time, what you did wasn’t viewed as wrong.
Ask Questions
For those who have done something inappropriate (not illegal – that’s another deal), ask:
- Who have I hurt through my actions? If you can be in touch with that person, and if you feel regret for your actions, apologize. Own your actions. Own that it was wrong. Ask for forgiveness.
- If you don’t know where that person is or how to reach them, become an advocate for what you know is right. So, when you hear people talking about this topic, tell them we’ve all done things that were stupid, yourself included, and that you regret the harm you caused the other person and want to make it right moving forward.
We each have a role to play as society stands up for men and women across the world. Moreover, if the world is to be better tomorrow for our wives, children, sisters, and moms, we have no choice but to say, “Everybody was drinking and they used to drink a lot of beer. And what we did, as a result, was wrong. I’d like to correct that starting today.”
Keynote speaker, trainer, and consultant, Sarah Gibson, helps organizations leverage the power of communication, teamwork, and diversity to improve engagement and transform teams. To buy her book or inquire about her speaking programs, please visit www.sarahjgibson.com.
